Jesus knows you’re here!”


A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, “Jesus knows you’re here.” 

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze.

When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard “Jesus is watching you.”

Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

Did you say that?” he hissed at the parrot.

“Yep”, the parrot confessed, then squawked,

“I’m just trying to warn you that he is watching you.”

The burglar relaxed. “Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?”

“Moses,” replied the bird.

“Moses?” the burglar laughed. “What kind of people would name a bird Moses?”

“The kind of people who would name a Rottweiler Jesus.”

About emanita01

I am a Franco-american woman who hails from Massachusetts. I live in France near the Swiss border, only minutes away from Geneva. I am a member of the Geneva Writers Group and the Association La Forge, a literary group based in France. I write stories, poems and am currently working on a couple of plays, a one-woman show and actively learning how to perform stand-up comedy.
This entry was posted in Fodder for Thought, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Jesus knows you’re here!”

  1. Gary says:

    Hallelujah….Justice is about to be served!
    And the Burglar may soon find Pearly White Salvation,
    Sunk deeply into his thieving heart!

    Perfect images for a humorous and thought provoking classic Emanita!

  2. emanita01 says:

    Hey, Gary. nice to see you perusing about these posts 😀
    I cannot take credit for this classic. Received it by email from a high school buddy who’s just recently reconnected. Glad you enjoyed it. It really had me ROTFL 😀

  3. lifewith4cats says:

    HAHAH good one!

  4. OptyMyst says:

    Oh, I like this. 🙂

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